I only saw myself in his eyes. I did not know whether that was a good thing or a bad thing. I may have just lost the man I had fallen in love with many years ago. For if, I did not see myself as Carrie I had a feeling John did not as well.I sat down beside him on the sofa taking his hand into mine as I asked, “You did not see me as Carrie did you John?”John shook his head no as I asked, “You did get what I meant?”“Yes, it is time I grow up and become the man I once was,” he replied squeezing my. That meant she knew where I was looking and she hadn't moved to cover. Now I became rock hard and terrified at the same time but her hand was working magic on me. The look in her eyes were so kind and so lustful at the same time, that I just wanted to make her as happy as I could no matter what I had to do. I didn't know the first thing about love making so I had no idea what to do next. Mrs. Sinclair took care of that for me by saying " Lets take a look at what we have in these pants of. Sit in the living room, turn on the tube, turn pages in some magazine, wait. Ignore all sorts of hysterical fears. Finally realize I'd been dozing in my chair, and wake to hear her key scratching in the lock. This time it was nearly three a.m. Her meetings rarely lasted this long. Usually they began and ended early and she was home by midnight. This time there were still gleams of daylight in the sky when she'd given me her usual quick light kiss on the cheek and her usual "G'bye for now. To her surprise he howledafter each one. It was obviously more painful than it looked. Once shefinished (the girl had said that six strokes was a good number for asissy's first beating), Gemma hung the crop from a coat peg on the doorwhere Mr Prentice would be able to see it from now on. It was in plainview of the bed, and it would be the first thing he saw each morningupon waking up. The girl had suggested that too. "You'll find a sissywill be considerably more compliant and polite in future.
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